Jimmy McMillian, the Rent is Too Damn High independant candidate in the hotly contested race of New York governor is becoming the talk of the town for his bold platform to curb New York City's rental prices. His explosive performance at the governor's debate on Monday night has overshadowed such prominent, "real" candidates such as Attorney General Andrew Cuomo and Carl Paladino, and turned the focus on one aspect of New York City's real estate market, which dwarfs in prices every other city in the country. But Mcmillian does not just stop at his agenda of lowering city rents and imposing sanctions on abusive landlords; he is also perfected the art of time travel. Yes, Jimmy McMillan has deciphered a way to hop the space time continuum and actually beam himself back in time to our day and age. McMillan, you see, it not from the world of 2010. No, McMillan is actually the President of the United Federation of Planets as seen in Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country.
See for yourself!
As you can clearly see, Jimmy McMillan IS the Federation President that was nearly assassinated by a human-Klingon team of traitors from the fifth movie in the Star Trek franchise. Same hair, same mustache, same dapper dress - it's the same guy! Though we have no idea why he has shot himself hundreds of years into the past, it is clear that his thirst for power, whether as head of a galatical federation or as head of New York City, he is willing and able to lead us into the future!
Ahh, so now it all makes sense, Jimmy McMillan. Your platform of rent control is just a cover for your plan to assimilate New Yorkers into the budding foundation of interstellar allegiances. Well, we at Mindwafers are all for it. We have been looking for new readers and new audiences and we would love the chance to be the first blog to go super nova into the Milky Way galaxy. Hey, even Romulans must have a list of Why People Suck too. So come Tuesday, November 2nd, a vote for your future is a vote for interstellar pride.
Vote Jimmy McMillan! Vote Mustache!
-Reece
RSS Feed
